He simply fell to his knees at the foot of his bed, his head pressed against the thick of the mattress and his hands clasped beneath his chin. He simply didn’t know what else to do. His ambitions had been taken. He knew it would take time. It would also take having a certain blindness while walking the streets and wondering what to do with himself.When he finally stood underneath the water that the showerhead trickled over him, he understood that he must somehow confront or at least make amends with what had dogged him for most of his life. He would have to visit the college in town and find something to study. The thought of relying on education didn’t sit too well with him, but he figured that colleges and universities such as the one that had attracted some of the brightest students in the county were actually made for people like him—the same people who didn’t have a place anywhere else in the world—and while he thought a little less of himself for not succeeding in the places. That's a good point." I wiped at my eyes. "Okay. I'm calm. It's not that funny."All right. What time did I get home last night? Why did I get home that late? Well... "Okay," I said. "Mom, you remember we talked about what my friends said to me, about not clinging to my dreams." I don't," my father said immediately."They told her not to let her fantasies blind her to reality," my mother supplied.My father nodded. "Wise words. Life is hard enough sometimes without lying to ourselves." Well... I didn't remember their advice," I said.There was a bit of a silence."Which means," my father finally prompted."I didn't see who he really was because I was too focused on who I thought he was," I said."Who?" my mother asked. "Which 'he'?"At first I was about to answer, Mark, of course, because, I mean, who else? But then it occurred to me just how much my mental picture of Zach had changed over the last few days. How much of him I knew now, that I hadn't before."... Well... Both, actually," I.
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